ChgoRed, Girl Editor

Names Changed to Protect...Me, Mainly

Thanks, world, for offering yet another example of why I should keep my maiden name after marriage.

One of my co-workers got married last year. Before the event, she wanted her name to appear on reports as "Jane Q. Smith." Fine, can do. After the event, she chose to take the name of her husband, Mr. Brown. Well, sorta... I think the idea was that her maiden name would now be her middle name. This would normally not be a problem. Not settling on one version of your name—very much a problem for me.

At various times since the wedding, she's asked that her name be printed as: Jane Q. Smith Brown, Jane Smith Brown, Jane S. Brown, or Jane Brown.  The "correct" version seems to change about every two months.

Just today, she asked that we use Jane Smith Brown, and 10 minutes later said to use Jane S. Brown. And she can't figure out why people can't keep it straight.

The Weekend Can't Come Soon Enough

Being a news junkie, I am always scanning the headlines. On occasion I do it too quickly, and everything turns into a sort of brain-created mashup.

Case in point. I just scanned these two headlines—

• Gov't releases proposed space tourism rules
• Fla. St. linebacker accused of sexual assault

—and the resulting jumble made me think the government was proposing new rules re: sex tourism in outer space. What's really sad is that for a moment, the idea seemed utterly reasonable and forward-thinking. Like, Wow. They're really on the ball over at NASA.

And then I thought, Oh, wait....

If I am lucky, the Boy will make me baked pasta tonight with red sauce. I hope. That and a hot bath would make my day.

How Much Difference Does One Letter Make?

A recent correction from The New York Times, (ganked from PlanetGordon.com).

Correction

A headline last Sunday about a wedding the previous evening misspelled the given name of the bride who was married to Jeffrey Alan Trogolo. She was Julia Saidenberg, not Julian.

Editorial Hijinx

Headline in today's New York Times:

"New Jersey Governor Resigns, Disclosing a Gay Affair"

Somewhere in New York, there is a very smug editor.

Shop Talk

As soon as I finished work today, I did two things. I took a cab home (a $20 luxury I usually reserve for when I need to feel spoiled) and went straight into a hot bath (also a bad day/feeling yucky mental balm).

Why two treats? Because I had to deal with exchanges like this.

Analyst: …and the last part of that sentence that I asked you to delete? It still needs to be taken out.
Me: Actually, you asked me to turn it into a separate sentence.
Analyst: Well, I meant for you to take it out.

All day, people. Meet the woman we will call Ms. P., an object lesson in How Not to Treat Your Editor.

Bad Editors! Bad!

The headline I least needed to see today:

"Woman Gives Birth to Boy Using Old Sperm"

Granted, it's...evocative. But, yuck. And aside from the lovely mental image, it's a grammatical stinkeroo. She didn't use the stuff to actually give birth. She used it for conception.

And did I mention, yuck?

Mushmouth

You might hear on the news tonight that John Kerry wants to blow Osama Bin Laden's brains out. Wow! What an exciting statement from any candidate, especially this early in the campaign!

Like we should be so lucky.

Why Spelling Matters

From pullquote's very clever blog, a little lesson.

You can tell it to the judge but please spell it correctly

A federal judge in Philadelphia, in prose suggesting barely suppressed chortles, reduced a lawyer's request for fees last month because his filings were infested with typographical errors.

And from the Wall Street Journal:

In addition to making repeated references to the "United States District Court for the Easter [sic] District of Pennsylvania," Mr. Puricelli listed the judge's name as "Jacon" Hart. "I appreciate the elevation to what sounds like a character in "The Lord of the Rings," the judge wrote, "but, alas, I am but a judge."

Careful Where You Point That

From Beefloral.com, a description of their silk calla lily.

"Natural Calla Lily with yellow pistol inside."

Does this count as a concealed weapon?

Where's My Red Pen?

Two from Reuters, no less, in an article about the Academy Award Nominees' Luncheon.

"Joe Roth, the veteran filmmaker producing his first Academy Awards telecast, admitted to a certain nervousness about the Feb. 29 show to be hosted by Billy Crystal, a show he promised would be "funny and quick" and have a surprise at the end when the cameras goes back stage to catch all the winners at once. "

Even better, the article describes Tim Robbins as being nominated for "nest supporting actor." Hee!