Any item is 30% more interesting if you put it in a laundry basket.
My clothes are now 28% cat hair, yet still wearable.
Every time someone goes to the kitchen, you should run after them. Since cats don’t own wristwatches (or, really, wrists) they can't tell when it's dinnertime. So it could be right now! Or now!
Perfecting a good Innocent Look can cut many punishments in half.
It might come in a stinky can and look like barf, but to them it’s a feast. Sometimes, barf is a feast. Watch for that.
The bathroom is a cave of wonders. You can walk around in the tub, sit behind the shower curtain, stick your paw between the radiator pipes, or just hide behind the door. However, if someone is running water in the sink or the shower, you should just sit in the doorway where you're safe. You’ll never believe how long those people can stay under the water. Like, TEN MINUTES at a time!
You can actually crawl into a bookcase. Of course, you’ll probably knock some on the floor at first. When The Man catches you and says something like, "So that's why books keep ending up on the floor!", try to look innocent. With practice, you can get your whole body over and behind a row of paperbacks without disturbing a page.
With the drawers in, it’s a dresser; when they’re pulled out, there’s all this play space! Where the drawer used to be! Squeeze in quick, before The Woman can catch you. Extra points if she has to remove the whole drawer to get you out.
Also good places to play/hide/sniff: Behind radiators, in cabinets, and under the couch cover. That last one is a great hiding space, and an excellent spot from which to ambush feet. Try not to get kicked.
That other cat sucks. If you bite them enough, maybe they'll go away.
