Sisterpalooza

This is how life works sometimes: One day, just on a hunch, you send an email. 10 weeks later, you are standing in the church you've always meant to visit. Someone opens a manila folder to reveal a photo of your great-grandfather and your heart takes a step back. You've never seen this one before. He's so young that he looks barely like himself. So young, his first wife is in the photo. But still, the face is there. It has been waiting all this time.

His was not the only waiting face. Last week was Sisterpalooza.

They came in from both coasts, and met in my town. And it went...really well. People keep asking me how it was, and I think they're envisioning a reunion like you see on Montel, with lots of over-the-top emotionality and freak-out sobbing. I hate to disappoint everyone, but it wasn't like that. This was more like friends getting together for the weekend.

Mostly, there was talking. A lot of talking. We spent a lot of time winnowing out the differences and the sames between us. There are some of each--her life, with two children and a family business, is very different from either of ours. Yet our approaches to things, likes and dislikes, seemed quite similar at times. I do think there was a lot of surreptitious glancing on everyone’s part—That looks like me…that doesn’t…I think those are mom’s hands… But that’s pretty natural. And it was...nice. And very friendly.

Besides, the big scenes will come next spring, when NewSister will probably go down to meet her/our mother. That will be pretty emotional.  For now, it was nice just to get to know each other and see some of the sights. Hancock Building, Andersonville, Greektown, etc. There were other sights, too—family photos and heirlooms, a review of the family tree. And the church.

I ’ve mentioned it here before. Joyce United Methodist, founded by my great-grandfather in 1895. Shamefully, I had never been inside. At a suggestion from NewSister, we decided to go take a look. Sunday afternoon, and it was closed. Hm. Some Web sleuthing and a forwarded email later, and we had an appointment to meet with the caretaker. He was kind enough to open the church for us on short notice, and I will always be thankful. We may well have come upon an empty lot.

The church wasn’t just closed for the day; it’s closed-closed. The congregation—at its peak, more than 450 people—has been in decline for a number of years, down to where they were getting fewer than 20 parishioners at a Sunday service. They’ve moved to another church entirely, and the local Methodist conference is trying to figure out what to do with the buil ding. Most likely, they will attempt to sell it. Unfortunately, anyone who wanted to use the building would have some work ahead of them (water damage, not ADA-accessible, etc.). Given that, and the fact that the church covers two city lots, the practical fact is that a buyer would probably be better off knocking down the church completely.

Not that we didn’t think about trying to save it. On the way home, there was much speculation about what could be done with the building--teahouse, art gallery, restaurant. But there was also the sad realization that to do so would require several truckloads of money, money that none of us has. If you are a millionaire and would like to save the building, please give me a call. Barring that kind of intervention, my guess is that it will probably come down.

sigh

I’ve offered my assistance. I know I probably can’t save the church. But maybe I can help give it a proper ending.

At least we got to see it. And we got to see her, too, this woman who has always been our sister. It’s all so amazing and unlikely that you can't really get emotional.  You can only marvel that it's happening at all. As you can imagine, by the time everyone had left on Tuesday, I was spent. But it was a good tired, a satisfying fatigue. Like I’d spent my energy trying to build something important, or grow a new branch.

Yes, exactly like that.

More photos at the Flickr account.

Comments

[Teri]

I'm happy the meeting with you, N. and NewSister went well (and I knew there wouldn't be any talkshow histrionics--that'll be next spring).