Eaten Up

Last night, a dream:

I’m hostess to a massive dessert party, somewhere that is not my house. Plates of cookies, pies, fabulously decorated cakes—the works. And people everywhere. Even Gary Sinise showed up, which is pretty weird because, well, he’s Gary Sinise, I do not know him, and no, he’s not this guy. Whatever. Tons of food, plus tons of people watching TV and eating sweets. For, like, two days.

Moral: You can act like you’re not on a diet; you can refuse to call it a diet; you can even tell everyone you know that “it’s not really a diet.” But your body always knows. And your body would like a Frappuccino, like, yesterday, please.

It’s not a diet.

More like, it’s what’s left after a lot of events collided. The fast-approaching date of my yearly physical (first in two years, but at least I got one resolution out of the way). Trip to see family, including my fabulously beautiful and supportive sister, who loves me even though my eating habits worry her. Wonderful family wedding…in a dance studio, which means there ain’t no avoiding the mirrors. The physical itself, starring the Hunky Gay Doctor from South America, who is very kind but who also sent out some gentle-doctor-concern rays. And you could probably throw in that Caroline Knapp book, even though I’d prefer to see fewer similarities between myself and Ms.-Self-Absorbed-of-Boston. (Well, she was.)

Mainly, it was the breakfast I had Thursday--2 chocolate donuts and a bottled mocha Frappuccino. Known in my head as “the special breakfast,” it was meant as a treat for when I was feeling blue or tired. Or when it was Friday. Or Monday.

Sometimes, there were 3 donuts.*

Last Thursday was my third "special breakfast" in 3 days, which means it wasn’t all that special anymore. It was just a routine, and not a very healthy one at that. Even as I enjoyed it, I knew I couldn’t keep eating this way. Then all that other stuff happened. Plus a red dress that reminded me how nice I could look, if I just worked at it a little more.

So, I’m starting small and keeping it simple. Carbs are still good, just not quite as many. More exercise (half-hour walk with the Boyfriend last night). More vegetables. Keeping a food diary again, because that’s what worked last time. Less sugar, fat and sodium. More water. Don’t worry about the numbers on the scale. Take my health a little more seriously.

Although I might cover some (eek!) “personal food issues” in my blog, I’ll do my best not to turn into one of those people who talks about nothing but their diet. Is there anything more boring?

And besides, it’s not a diet. It’s just some changes.

*Sorry, honey. You didn’t know.

Comments

[Teri]

Hey!! Gary's one of my former actor obsessions. What the hell's he doing in your dream?

[ChgoRed]

That was exactly my question. I mean, I loved him in "Wallace," but it didn't inspire me to give him baked goods.

And whaddya mean "former"?